I would like to start off by offering my sincerest apologies to the ouddict admin and staff who have allowed me to post my subitism heaters here entrusting me with the responsibility of being a resident artisan amongst the other far more respectable giant respectable artisans on this beautiful forum. However, it is regrettable and quite a headache for small business owners to deal with such individuals such as "Bigboy". This message will be an in-detail and clear response to clear my name and the name of OmbréAroma.
Let us start off with a timeline, I first interacted with this individual on 1/7/2025, below is the entirety of our conversation on eBay.
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These next two strings of messages were sent after the heater had been purchased:
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After going through all of these messages let me now discuss their content. It is apparent throughout that I have been nothing short of kind, respectful, and transparent. However, I was not reciprocated with the same attitude. I had been appreciating all of the advice that the individual had been giving.
I will now go over the red flags that had been raised during the interaction and after the product was purchased (keep in mind that it had only been purchased, nothing was shipped or delivered) and my mistakes in not canceling the deal sooner:
1. The badgering of the price, I had the heater posted for $250 and then offered it to him for $200 to which the individual did not want to pay and hence suggested a heinous offer of $100, as any business owner knows how much of an insult and inconsiderate that offer even is, I should have realized this red flag and declined sale right there and then which was my first mistake.
Note: I am in no way against offers or giving deals to people as at the end of the day I would want everyone who loves oud to benefit and enjoy the heaters that I make however asking for $150 off; the question itself is disrespectful for the craftsman and the craft. Even then I had counter-offered with $160 (which was still a big discount) to which the individual had accepted with his posted conditions as if I was his worker completing all of his desires. I have a feeling the individual will mention this in his response so I will discuss it now. He had mentioned that he wanted the price to be $160 shipped however as my honest mistake I did not process that part and hence had kept the shipping and made no claims to remove the shipping, to which he made a remark about there being shipping which was around $10, but he decided to send me the remark after accepting the offer, if he had done so prior; reminding me he did not want to pay shipping I would have gladly met his request but "he bought it anyway".
2. Utilizing leaving good reviews to meet his demands of a lower price: Based upon the messages one can see that in order to get the price for which he had desired to purchase the burner he was trying to bribe me with good reviews and rapport amongst the oud community. This was my second mistake and I shouldn't have let anyone take advantage of me like that, but in good faith, I went on hoping to please this individual as a new seller.
3. The third and final straw before I had decided not to sell to him at all was his strand of messages after accepting the offer which came off as a slap to the face as a craftsman. The individual then began to state to make sure I check the burner and make a sarcastic comment to make sure it is in working condition and that he is not going to get electrocuted, and to place heat retardent screws as another subitism burner vendor had done with his products. Then the individual questioned the quality of my whether the wiring was wrapped etc. (after he had already placed the order). Furthermore, the individual's last remark was even more puzzling as he said "I don't know what kind of material you used but I will soon".
The matter of fact is that this interaction was completely one-sided and I as a seller have the right to refuse business to anyone, I am not sure why this individual is making such a scene about this, it could be because he was not able to purchase and receive his burner for the price that HE wanted it at. There really is nothing to be negative or try to shut down another person's business, if you walk into a store and go to the register to purchase an item and hand over the cash to the business owner in this scenario, then after handing over the cash start to question the product's safety/quality "I hope this doesn't poison, electrocute, harm me" in a condescending way after comparing the product to other products. The business owner would probably hand you back your cash and tell you to take your business elsewhere because no one should tolerate disrespect.
This truly is an unfortunate situation because I could keep showing evidence and talking about how negative this individual has been towards me but for the sake of the brand's reputation, I must take out the time to show the truth and the truth always prevails. The matter of the fact was that after seeing these final messages, I had a very bitter taste in my mouth and decided to reach out to eBay for their opinion, I had contacted eBay via phone. While getting on the phone with them, they had gone over the messages with whubba1 "Bigboy" and said this is clear harassment, then further supported my decision and said we will get this order canceled for you and no negative feedback will be left on your account. They then told me to block the user and not engage in ANY further conversation with him. I myself did not act on my own and cancel the order, I had gone through eBay and followed their protocol and guidance to the T and done exactly what they had told me to do.
Fast Forward 2/9/2025:|
Before I start this series of texts, I would like to mention that I am only posting this since I was publically called out it is my duty to publically respond and defend my honor and the honor of my business. If the individual had even messaged me this privately, due to his prior attitude and demeanor I would not have responded, this is because the background and tradition I come from teaches us "The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: 'Whoever gives up telling lies in support of a false claim, a palace will be built for him in the outskirts of Paradise. Whoever gives up argument when he is in the right, a palace will be built from him in the middle (of Paradise). And whoever had good behavior, a palace will be built for him in the highest reaches (of Paradise).'" Hence I did not want to engage in further back and forth with the individual as I try my best to stick to the tradition. Either way, the individual wanted to keep surfacing the issue, so I am here not responding to the individual still, but rather clearing my name and the name and reputation of my business.
Shortly after I had posted my burners here on Ouddict then the same individual from eBay had found my posting and sent me the following message:
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From this, it is quite clear that the individual is trying to give me an "opportunity" but an opportunity for what I have still not understood to this point. Whatever it may be it is apparent that this message has a looming threat of "Do this, listen to me or I will leave a bad review". Almost as if I am an employee. In short, this was a lot of negativity and by my initial cancellation of the individual's order through eBay it is clear enough that I did not wish to do business with him.
Let us now break down the content of this message and its inaccuracies:
1. The individual states that I had ignored his messages, in fact, I had blocked him due to the harassment and eBay's advice telling me to block the user and not communicate with him any further hence was not able to contact him on eBay after his last 2 remarks.
2. The individual states he has been a member of the forum since it began, which is another inaccuracy, his account says joined on February 6th, 2020 whereas my own account is older than this joining on December 4th, 2019.
3. The individual states that he has no interest in making trouble for me, however, this whole situation is a very big trouble indeed.
4. The individual states that he wants to be respected as a buyer and get the heater he was waiting for, however, I have shown nothing but respect towards him, and the reason for canceling the order was due to what was brought upon himself and his demeanor. There is nothing disrespectful about not wanting to sell to someone who already undervalues and criticizes your product before even obtaining it. As for the waiting part the individual had placed the order and I had canceled it the next day, nothing was shipped, and the money was sent back through eBay instantly.
In retrospect let us examine this individual's own reviews and see if he is a genuine person to do business with:
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This review can be accessed and viewed on "Bigboy's" profile and I need not expand on this as it is self-explanatory. I am only thankful to The Almighty who had protected me from engaging in further business with this individual and it becoming an even bigger headache. Alhamdulillah.
The Summary: The individual has publically tried tarnishing my name and taking advantage of me being a new seller, but as I stated in the beginning which I will now reiterate. "And declare "The truth has come and falsehood has vanished. Indeed, falsehood is bound to vanish"" (17:81). I really am sorry to all those interested in my subitism burners and my business along with the admin of this beautiful form for having to see all of this aired out in public. However unfortunately I am not in control of other people's actions, if anyone may have any further questions or further clarifications needed from my side on this please do not hesitate to send me a message, Insha Allah I will with complete and full transparency answer everything. Furthermore, this individual posting this and having this back and forth is something truly unprofessional and even further disrespectful as it is first completely portrayed in a demeaning and untrue manner, secondly, I have not even sold a heater to this individual so I am not even sure what he is reviewing, in simple all that happened was that he wanted to buy my burner for the heinous offer to which I counter offered he accepted then left foul messages to then which I canceled the order he received all of his money back and did not want to engage in any further conversation with someone who disrespects and tries manipulating me in this manner to the point where even eBay had deemed it as harassment and had requested me to block the buyer.
In simple terms:
1. Buyer sent offer.
2. I sent counter offer.
3. Buyer accepted with conditions.
4. After accepting buyer left concerning and sarcastic messages.
5. I did not appreciate all of his demeanors up until that point and no longer thought he was a good fit for my product.
6. Canceled the order and the buyer received all of the money back.
By sarcastic I mean that of course if the subitism heater is used in the manner that it is meant to be used in no one is going to get electrocuted or injured, as I had stated both in my ouddict post and my eBay listing. Furthermore, based on this timeline above, there was literally no harm done to either side, but it is very apparent where the aggressor is in this entire situation. I still do not understand the problem here, the only thing I can think of is being upset that the order was canceled and the seller was not responding however that is a given, you treat people with respect and then you will be respected and as a business we withhold the right to refuse business to anyone. The buyer was given a total refund and there was no physical or financial loss.
It truly saddens me that individuals have to come and publically try to throw down businesses on literally NO grounds whatsoever as explained in detail here. On top of that while one's own reviews are extremely concerning and negative to then go around leaving negative reviews WITHOUT even purchasing or lack of better terms obtaining any product from the business is nothing short of disrespectful, inconsiderate, and looking to cause problems.
I love oud and the oud community this is a community, not a money-making side hustle, we are here to share our creations and bring love for the niche as a whole, not to dog down other people when they choose not to sell to certain individuals for their behavior and unrealistic requests.
Again if there are any more questions that I have left unanswered please by no hesitation contact me I will clear it out so much there won't even be a shadow of a doubt in my integrity as a person and a seller insha Allah. I hope that this message is enough I truly do, it pains me so much that the public has to deal with such utter nonsense.
